Thursday 9 February 2012

What a week...

Believe it or not, this is take two of THIS blog... I wrote heaps on Wednesday night and lost the lot... I've been too pissed off to start all over again but as it's Friday I'll give it a go.

MRI day (Wednesday) progressed slowly - the nerves kicked in pretty much as soon as I woke up.  I don't think my nerves have anything to do with the machine any more, but the process of getting a line into my arm for the first time in 5 months was a little daunting... I remember the very last time in that very same bed the Dr finally getting the equipment in after quite a process and apologising for the 'blood bath'.  Now those that know me, know that even after all this I do not do blood particularly well so this was what the butterflies in my tummy were reacting to.  This and I had medicated myself a little too late so wasn't feeling as calm as I could have!

The wonderful lady (technician? I'm not sure what to call her!) asked if she could have a look first and have a try as practice was the only way she would get better.  Of course I let her have a try, it was unfortunately unsuccessful so the Dr was called - as we thought may happen - hence the appointment on the day when he was in-house!  Lovely Dr was also unsuccessful...so he called in the big guns... an ultrasound machine from upstairs!  This was a fascinating distraction for me, I got to watch the black and white screen (and consequently the vein rolling out of the way of the needle) while the Dr tinkered away at my arm.  I have never had this experience before but it has been written on my notes as THE way it will be done from now on... Dr and Ultrasound!

My scan was scheduled for 2:45 but due to me being difficult to 'stick' another patient jumped the queue and we left at 4:30... a long afternoon but the staff were all wonderful and they remembered me from the day after I was admitted - when I needed the 'jungle-juice' to get me into the machine.  The scan has become the easy bit - pre and post contrast, Tim signed his life away and came in with me again.  I don't feel like I need him there for my anxiety anymore, but it's nice to have someone to pull funny faces at and pass the time!

The next duty required of me that week was bloods... yay!  Friday was the day, Feilding Medlab was the place... unfortunately my veins were so damaged from MRI day, and the others (hands, side of wrists) had gone into hiding.  I decided to sit up on the bed this time, thought I'd be brave (as I could watch the whole thing lying down last time) and challenge myself a little further!  I managed to sit up for the whole thing until she gave up and decided to pass me on to the other lady... then I began to feel a bit woozy! All in all it was two ladies and 7 tries but they got blood!

The long weekend was pretty quiet for me, Tim was at the Sevens with work so Toby and I hung out around home.  It was nice, but would have loved to be able to drive and go visiting or something.  My cousin came to stay with us for some extra company, and in case we needed to go anywhere - my family are wonderful taxi drivers xx

With results day looming for Tuesday, neither of us slept particularly well Monday night and were pretty tired to begin the day.  For a day that dragged on, we were very nearly late for our appointment at Oncology.  We had a small wait sitting in the waiting area so I grabbed a magazine to flick through to curb my nervous energy... wasn't reading it, just giving myself something else to do!  It was really obvious how much my hands were shaking holding the pages so that didn't last long, but then we were called.  After exchanging pleasantries and a quick update of how the last chemo cycle went for me the Dr said that he'd had a chance to look over my scan and it was 'perfect'.  The look of relief on Tims face was a huge relief to me, and I could have jumped off the chair - but didn't :o)

He went on to say that there is no evidence of residual disease, however his nurse was quick to point out that it didn't mean that there WASN'T anything there - it could just be too tiny for the scan not to pick up at this stage.  I was happy with that... I figure if the scan couldn't pick it up then it's possibly too small to actually worry about anyway!  Tim asked for clarification on how good the scan was and was told that at this stage in treatment it was the best they have seen - yay for me!  I was (am) super excited about that result - a huge weight off my (our) shoulders for now.  "If there was an element of beauty in oncology - this would be it" Said Dr, pointing to the scan images on the screen "You have a beautiful brain".

Happy with that.

He went on to tell me that chemo would be postponed due to a low platelet count... apparently they don't issue the prescription unless the count is above 100 and my count was 69... previously I was 2-300 so it was quite a dramatic drop.  I was reassured that it was nothing to be worried about, that I was in no danger (just to watch my bruising and bleeding!), and that they wouldn't infuse any until my count got below 10.

So more bloods were prescribed for a weeks time (yay) and time off chemo until the count is satisfactory.

That ends the cancer update.

We have been busy at home getting things ticked off the list for permit-approval at the end of the month... next job is painting the house and getting the digger in for a septic tank tickle-up.  We'll see how much we get done this weekend!

Next weekend is my graduation which I'm trying hard not to think too much about...I'm excited to finally be there and to be able to graduate with my actual class, but the nerves are setting in for the speaking part... haven't looked at it at all this week... blamed it on having too much else going on but really just wanted it to go away!  I'll dose myself up with some anti-anxiety stuff and I'm sure I'll be as cool as a cucumber... cross fingers anyway.

My Degree Upgrade course starts on Monday... might need to dose myself up for that too... think I might be slightly mad to be going back to more study but once it's done I think that will be it... unless of course I find something else to do!

Toby has settled back into school without too much drama - the wrong stationary list probably having been the worst of it.  He's loving his new teacher and the new tasks and different homework... swimming every day tires him out too so we are grateful for the hot weather (today being the exception to that of course).

We are gearing up for Relay for Life this March - really looking forward to being there in the atmosphere... it's such a super special place to be, and to share it with super special friends and family will be the icing on the cake.

Thanks to all my supporters for their prayers, thoughts, well-wishes, and positive vibes coming my way... all these, plus my amazing family and friends, are what keeps me 'up' high and trucking along...


We are unstoppable and I love you all xxx